In the Red Deeps
ttingroom eaco and along to to tting tter not alone, as usual. Some one ime to feel t it to c by a side glance, looked s tairs; for Mr akem sometimes came in and inspected t t ting sell so tom, and to at all agitating to Maggie to see Pained itude and pity too en oget t sort of P be altered by care about o , tle altered - it ured boys face, y to ay, and after all ations, Maggie felt t so say a feo still be melanco be, and like o look at o like t Maggie glanced too s face toarted from to reac do scrying to repress to recall snatcil surning along the road, and she could go down again.
It o lengt t be finis s beyond te, and satisfied ting out of doors. One of o go to St Oggs, o a spot t lay beyond rise of ground crorees, lying along tes of Dorlcote Mill. Insignificant, I call it, because in it s oeful result, and t is rees, making an uneven er of a mile along t side of Dorlcote Mill and t fields be bounded by t urned off and led to t o very capricious ed stone-quarry - so long exed t botrees, and retc close-nibbled. In ao reconcile o an excursion ting every no rest ually on t on a grassy ooping aslant from teep above en to ts, like tiniest bells on t of Silence, or see t piercing tant bougo cruant ime too, t ional reason o any ot, on t day so sometimes, in ion, s s to deny indulgence in it.
You may see e turning and enters tcall figure and old lavender goary black silk s-like material; and noies it over ainly suppose o be farteent seem to ed, pered figure ood ary and voluntary , and ts in race: t croing all figure, so of kinsc en sees in older faces under borderless caps, out of keeping ant youts to flas in a sudden, passionate glance t e all tude, like a damped fire leaping out again when all seemed safe.
But Maggie uneasy at t. S trees and t t t storms urned upartled gesture to see P raised , and to out oo coloured o pleasure. S out t t rong in to speak.
`You startled me, sly. `I never meet any one o be me?
It to perceive t Maggie felt herself a child again.
`Yes, I did, said Pill embarrassed. `I o see if you ; but you never came. tcoday, and you in sig be displeased h me.
`No, said Maggie Po accompany o unity of speaking to you. Ive never forgotten o tom, and me too; but I sure t you om and I deal of trouble since t makes one t rouble came.
`I cant believe t you of me so muc of you, said Pimidly. `Do you kno morning in tudy me.
Pure-case from , and opened it. Maggie sao space range, dreamy eyes. It er-colour sketc as a portrait.
`O dear, said Maggie, smiling, and flus a queer little girl I pink frock. I really tle pause: `am I like ed me to be?
t te, but t glance Maggie turned on P t of a coquette. S it e deligion and love. P , before ly, `No, Maggie.
t died out a little from Maggies face, and t trembling of t s turn ao look at hen he said, slowly,
`You are very muciful t you would be.
`Am I? said Maggie, turning in a deeper flusurned ook some steps looking straiging o tomed to ty, t in abstaining from t more of abandoning all care for adornment, templation of , occurred to s o like tc sig no room for any otrees and o a green surrounded by an ampre of t as t about tened, Maggies face its gloill w Philip again, she said in a serious, sad voice,
`I t is trial I o bear in everyt keep anyto love ; and tom is different - and my fat is like deat part part never take any notice of eac I ed to speak to you for. I ed to let you kno tom and I cant do as suc if I beten all about you, it is not out of envy or pride - or - or any bad feeling.
Maggie spoke leness as s on, and o fill ears. tronger resemblance to y appeal more strongly to y.
`I kno you mean, , `I knoo keep us apart on bot it is not rig you be angry o call you Maggie in my ts - it is not rigo sacrifice everyto ot deal for my fat I give up a friendstac of any sort, in obedience to any recognise as right.
`I dont knoen, ed, it o me t I bound to give up anytill it o me t I could ty. But no good - it ate of mind. Im quite sure t o him.
`But make o see eacimes? said Po say somet checked himself.
`O, Im sure like it. Dont ask me , said Maggie, in a distressed tone. `My fatrongly about some t at all happy.
`No more am I, said Puously, `I am not happy.
`ly. `At least - I oug to ask - but Im very, very sorry.
Purned to ience to stand still any longer, and t out of t trees and buser t last o insist immediately on ting.
`Ive been a great deal last, timidly, `since I , and being discontented because I couldnt ermined for us - and it makes t is laid upon us and doing o do.
`But I cant give up ly. `It seems to me o be beautiful and good, and er tisfied til our feelings are deadened? I deligures - I long to be able to paint sucrive and strive, and cant produce . t is pain to me, and alil my faculties lose tated a little, and t ot iful in it - I have lived.
`O P feel so. But began to beat ent.
`ell, turning quickly round and fixing reatingly on ented to live, if you me see you sometimes. ted, o me. And if I could only see you no me talk to you a little, and s you cared for me - and t o be glad of life.
`But eringly. (Could s speak to erest to vary t erest before it came.)
`If you me see you imes - ented if it could injure no ones en my life. Besides-- P on, ive astuteness of love at one-and-ty, `if ty beto us, ry and quenc by our friends by our influence on bot bring about a , if I could kno t believe ty in my orary.
Maggie s, under conflicting ts. It seemed to ion t to see P only innocent but good; per really o find contentment, as s. t said t music to Maggie; but at it t monotonous o obey - t sucervieo be discovered in, somet, if discovered, must cause anger and pain, and t t as a spiritual blig t again, like c breeze, persuading ts and tile sacrifice for one, to t iveness too ain pang, alt made to tterness to ion t Maggie as frank and unconstrained towards him as when she was a child.
`I cant say eit last, turning round and o , lest I s seek for guidance.
`May I come again, to-morro day - or next week?
`I tter e, said Maggie faltering again. `I o go to St Oggs sometimes, and I can put tter in t.
`O no, said P be so see tter - and - any enmity, I believe, but ly from me; deal about ion. Pray let me come ell me ell me, I en as I can till I do see you.
`I t must be so, t be quite certain of coming icular evening.
Maggie felt a great relief in adjourning to enjoy tes of companions t s linger a little: t time t, so pain Pelling ermination.
`I cant er a fes of silence, `range it is t alked to eac as if it erday Lorton. And yet botered in t is five years. you seemed to of feeling t I quite so sure t you so muco fill your mind - I quite sure you me now.
`I t you see you, said P made me like you better t to explain t: I dont trongest effects our natures are susceptible of can ever be explained. e can neitect t nor t on us. test of painters only once painted a mysteriously divine c old - and tell o be divine. I tores laid up in our ure t our understanding can make no complete inventory of. Certain strains of music affect me so strangely - I can never ttitude of mind for a time, and if t I might be capable of heroisms.
`A you mean about music - I feel so, said Maggie, clasping uosity. `At least, sone, `I used to feel so church.
`And you long for it, Maggie? said P ionate pity. `Atle t is beautiful in your life. tle girl.
to t, reflected from ters.
`No, I ly, `except a very, very few.
Paken from a small volume, and the back, as he said,
`A o take it it in my pocket because I am studying a scene for a picture.
Maggie too and saitle: it revived an old impression ering force.
`quot;te,quot; saking t once - I read to o read t. I on in my o of t beginning. Poor Minna! I get my mind aland Isles - I used to feel the rough sea.
Maggie spoke rapidly ening eyes.
`take t volume c. `I dont it noead - you among tcing shadows.
Maggie o P, as if to say `avaunt to floating visions.
`Do keep it, Maggie, said Preatingly, `it will give you pleasure.
`No, tting it aside o be; it o see and kno would make me long for a full life.
`But you al lot: is narroicism - I dont like to see you persisting in it, Maggie. Poetry and art and knowledge are sacred and pure.
`But not for me - not for me, said Maggie, oo muc - t last long.
`Dont saying quot;good by,quot; Maggie, said Pcinued still to speaking. `I must not go any fart I?
`O no, I forgot; goodby, said Maggie, pausing and putting out o ion brougrong current to Per tood looking at eacs, hdrawing her hand,
`Im very grateful to you for t is very s to a iful t seems t God s so t you could care about a queer little girl I t you cared for me more tom did.
`A fretfully, `you her.
`Per, said Maggie, simply, `but t tanding om by t is dark to me. But I s you - t keep apart.
`Dont say so, Maggie, said P t little girl in my mind for five years, didnt I earn some part in not to take e away from me.
`Not if I I am not - I must submit. Sated a moment and ted to say to you, t you ter not take more notice of my brot boo old me not to speak to you again, and c. I am too long away. Good by. She gave him her hand once more.
`I sen as I can till I see you again, Maggie. - hers.
`Yes, yes, I fir-tree; ter es, as if ill.
Maggie already begun; P o do not remember and oed intervie you must not suppose t isfied persuading o infuse some o Maggies life - seeking t ends for test promise of love to girlisenderness s o cely ty, t s love o associate cenderness, o. If any o claim it all. ty of it t a mind like s very yout tree, for of t and space it o flouris , by persuading of em of privation? not seeing her.