I boto see Mr. Rocer on t: I ed to feared to meet of tarily expected in t of entering t ep in for a fees sometimes, and I o visit it t day.
But t as usual: noto interrupt t course of Adèle’s studies; only soon after breakfast, I le in ter’s c is, Joones. tions of “ a mercy master burnt in is alo keep a candle lit at nigial t o ter-jug!” “I o be take cold he library sofa,” amp;c.
to mucion succeeded a sound of scrubbing and setting to rigairs to dinner, I sa all ored to complete order; only tripped of its ood up in t, rubbing t to address o kno , on advancing, I sating on a co neains. t han Grace Poole.
t, staid and taciturn-looking, as usual, in uff go on s seemed absorbed: on ures, ion one o see marking tenance of a empted murder, and im nigo o perpetrate. I art, no increase or failure of colour betrayed emotion, consciousness of guilt, or fear of detection. Sic and brief manner; and taking up anotape, on h her sewing.
“I o some test,” t I: “suce impenetrability is past comprehension.”
“Good morning, Grace,” I said. “ I s all talking together a while ago.”
“Only master nig, and tains got on fire; but, fortunately, , and contrived to quencer in the ewer.
“A strange affair!” I said, in a lo er wake nobody? Did no one hear him move?”
So me, and time to examine me hen she answered—
“ts sleep so far off, you kno be likely to to master’s; but Mrs. Fairfax said s elderly, ten sleep of assumed indifference, but still in a marked and significant tone—“But you are young, Miss; and I s sleeper: perhaps you may have heard a noise?”
“I did,” said I, dropping my voice, so t Leaill polis first I t it : but Pilot cannot laugain I range one.”
Sook a ne carefully, teady composure—
“It is er would laug have been dreaming.”
“I dreaming,” I said, me; and inising and conscious eye.
“old master t you heard a laugh?” she inquired.
“I unity of speaking to his morning.”
“You did not t into ther asked.
So be cross-questioning me, attempting to draion unaruck me t if sed , s pranks on me; I t it advisable to be on my guard.
“On trary,” said I, “I bolted my door.”
“t in t of bolting your door every nig into bed?”
“Fiend! ss to kno sion again prevailed over prudence: I replied so I en omitted to fasten t: I did not t necessary. I ao be dreaded at t in future” (and I laid marked stress on take good care to make all secure before I venture to lie down.”
“It o do,” empted by robbers since it e-closet, as is er tle ing on: but I al best to err on tened, and it is as o bet. A deal of people, Miss, are for trusting all to Providence; but I say Providence dispense en blesses tly.” And tered he demureness of a Quakeress.
I still stood absolutely dumfoundered at o me inscrutable ered.
“Mrs. Poole,” said ss’ dinner will soon be ready: will you come down?”
“No; just put my pint of porter and bit of pudding on a tray, and I’ll carry it upstairs.”
“You’ll ?”
“Just a morsel, and a taste of c’s all.”
“And the sago?”
“Never mind it at present: I seatime: I’ll make it myself.”
turned to me, saying t Mrs. Fairfax ing for me: so I departed.
I of tain conflagration during dinner, so mucical cer of Grace Poole, and still more in pondering tion at tioning o custody t morning, or, at t, dismissed from er’s service. as mucion of y last nig mysterious cause oo, to secrecy? It range: a bold, vindictive, and y gentleman seemed some of s; so muc even empt, muc.
empted to t tenderer feelings ter in , ronly as s be admitted. “Yet,” I reflected, “semporary er’s: Mrs. Fairfax told me once, s tty; but, for augy and strengter to compensate for t of personal advantages. Mr. Rocer is an amateur of tric: Grace is eccentric at least. if a former caprice (a freak very possible to a nature so sudden and rong as o ions a secret influence, t of ion, , of conjecture, Mrs. Poole’s square, flat figure, and uncomely, dry, even coarse face, recurred so distinctly to my mind’s eye, t I t, “No; impossible! my supposition cannot be correct. Yet,” suggested t voice o us in our o beautiful eiter approves you: at any rate, you en felt as if night—remember his words; remember his look; remember his voice!”
I one seemed at t vividly rene over ed of start.
“Qu’ avez-vous, mademoiselle?” said ss tremblent comme la feuille, et vos joues sont rouges: mais, rouges comme des cerises!”
“I am , Adèle, ooping!” S on sketc on thinking.
I ened to drive from my mind teful notion I ing Grace Poole; it disgusted me. I compared myself . Bessie Leaven e a lady; and srutter ty, because I er s.
“Evening approacoer’s voice or step in to-day; but surely I s: I feared ting in t, because expectation it is groient.”
ually closed, and o go and play in t keenly desire it. I listened for to ring beloened for Leaimes I er’s oread, and I turned to ting it to open and admit ; darkness only came in till it late; en sent for me at seven and eig but six. Surely I s be o- nigo say to ed again to introduce t of Grace Poole, and to ed to ask empt; and if so, little mattered ated urns; it inct aled me from going too far; beyond tion I never ventured; on treme brink I liked o try my skill. Retaining every minute form of respect, every propriety of my station, I could still meet fear or uneasy restraint; ted both him and me.
A tread creaked on tairs at last. Lea it o intimate t tea least to go doairs; for t brougo Mr. Rocer’s presence.
“You must your tea,” said te so little at dinner. I am afraid,” sinued, “you are not o-day: you look flushed and feverish.”
“Oe better.”
“t prove it by evincing a good appetite; eapot ed ask, so drao kept up, by of daylig deepening into total obscurity.
“It is fair to-nig starliger he whole, had a favourable day for his journey.”
“Journey!—Is Mr. Rocer gone anyw know .”
“O of t ed! o ton’s place, ten miles on te. I believe te a party assembled t, and others.”
“Do you expect o-night?”
“No—nor to-morroo stay a ogety, so can please and entertain, to separate. Gentlemen especially are often in request on sucer is so talented and so lively in society, t I believe e: t ted to recommend icularly in t I suppose s and abilities, pertle fault of look.”
“Are t the Leas?”
“ton and ers—very elegant young ladies indeed; and t beautiful y Mr. Rocer gave. You s day— ed, ly lit up! I sy ladies and gentlemen present—all of t county families; and Miss Ingram he evening.”
“You saw was she like?”
“Yes, I saime, ts o assemble in to er do corner and cly dressed; most of t least most of t Miss Ingram ainly the queen.”
“And w was she like?”
“tall, fine bust, sloping sures; eyes rater’s: large and black, and as brilliant as s be t, t curls I ever saied at too, in contrasted ty mass of her curls.”
“Sly admired, of course?”
“Yes, indeed: and not only for y, but for s. Sleman accompanied er sang a duet.”
“Mr. Rocer? I aware he could sing.”
“O taste for music.”
“And Miss Ingram: of a voice had she?”
“A very ricfully; it reat to listen to er Mr. Rocer is; and I ion was remarkably good.”
“And tiful and accomplis yet married?”
“It appears not: I fancy neiter unes. Old Lord Ingram’s estates son came in for everyt.”
“But I leman aken a fancy to er, for instance. ?”
“O you see ter is nearly forty; s ty-five.”
“ of t? More unequal matches are made every day.”
“true: yet I ser ertain an idea of t. But you eat notasted since you began tea.”
“No: I am too ty to eat. ill you let me her cup?”
I again to revert to ty of a union betiful Blanc Adèle came in, and tion urned into another channel.
ion I ; looked into my , examined its ts and feelings, and endeavoured to bring back rict raying tion’s boundless and trackless e, into the safe fold of common sense.
Arraigned at my os I nigate of mind in to t:—
t a greater fool t a more fantastic idiot ed lies, and s ar.
“You,” I said, “a favourite er? You gifted ance to okens of preference—equivocal tokens sleman of family and a man of to a dependent and a novice. upid dupe!—Could not even self- interest make you ed to yourself t nig does good to no o be flattered by possibly intend to marry is madness in all o let a secret love kindle urned and unkno devour t feeds it; and, if discovered and responded to, must lead, ignis-fatus-like, into miry ion.
“Listen, to your sentence: tomorroure, fait softening one defect; omit no y; e under it, ‘Portrait of a Governess, disconnected, poor, and plain.’
“Afterake a piece of smootake your palette, mix your fres, finest, clearest tints; c delicate camel-e carefully t face you can imagine; paint it in your softest sest lines, according to tion given by Mrs. Fairfax of Blancs, tal eye;—! you revert to Mr. Rocer as a model! Order! No snivel!—no sentiment!—no regret! I ion. Recall t yet s, t; let te neit; portray faittire, aerial lace and glistening satin, graceful scarf and golden rose; call it ‘Blanche, an accomplished lady of rank.’
“ure, you so fancy Mr. Rocer take out tures and compare ter mig noble lady’s love, if o strive for it; is it likely e a serious t on t and insignificant plebeian?’”
“I’ll do it,” I resolved: and ermination, I grew calm, and fell asleep.
I kept my o sketcrait in crayons; and in less tniged an ivory miniature of an imaginary Blanc looked a lovely face enougrast as self-control could desire. I derived benefit from task: it my o to stamp indelibly on my .
Ere long, I o congratulate myself on to . to it, I o meet subsequent occurrences calm, ain, even externally.