I got Molly to run doo  go up to myself  to do but I  anyalked  to  sound like in to see me or  in but  o come on so . Cel  to  he mornin.

    out on tea and I  guess  t of said somet oldern me.

    ten years maybe. I told  Id come to tell  old s.

    set ttin in a stle and  glass of tea in  knoo say so I just s  up and  te some time. And t look at me,  looked out across t rifles I ever sa knoo say. I said: Yessir.

    nam you know.

    I said I didnt kno.

    in no drug deals.

    No sir. .

    raised t way, he said.

    Yessir.

    as you in the war?

    Yes I re.

    to visit several families of buddies of

    made it back.  up.  knoo say to em. tin t  in  tand.

    Yessir. I can understand t.

    I can too. But aside from t t t as soon  left over t  in ttle of it. ar out of one or ttin on   of t come back, till  it  ry be I t mig even. try t still is. It  t. It  t of t got sent over teen, nineteen year old.

    urned and looked at me. And t  older. ell you it nam brougry to its knees. But I  never believed t. It  the cake.

    e didnt o give to em to take over t em  rifles I  dont kno muc go to . You  cant go to  God. I dont knoo  one  comes. I surely dont.

    And t ty muc ime. t day o be my last day in to t. I drove back to  I-10 along to Cook 501. I tried to put tive but sometimes youre just too close to it. Its a lifes o see yourself  for  be  is somet   to be . Ive t about ed to be a la of me t ed to be in cty muced on it.

    anted people to listen to  t of me too t just  ed to pull everbody back in t. If Ive tried to cultivate anyts been t.

    I t is to come and I dont care akes. And  it ain us. talk to, if you could of told em t treets of  our texas to even understand,  flat out  of believed you. But old em it  is signs and  it dont tell you  got t  dont tell you not s fixin to  get, neit of it  I could at least some t  and I guess I just dont feel t  knoalkin about.  goin to get better neito stand for somet I dont  I once did. Asked to believe in  somet not s t it even  . Seen any number of believers fall away.

    Ive been forced to look at it again and Ive been forced to look at myself. For better or  for  kno kno I o ts of doubts before. If Im   come at a price. Pretty good price too. old tin s first didnt  take me to mean it literally but I told . I told y er sense to even vote for me. I told  feel  rigakin t mean t and I told  it ever   over too and I dont knoo do about t eit set time. I didnt t

    done. Finally I just said: Loretta, I cant do it no more. And so quit o quit. I  aint a. I never  up. I   as soon t it  of got told but t it in t up to  Ozona and talked to trict attorney up talk to t  Mexicans laed and maybe testify at trial but t hey would do.

    Meanin t t do not and of course it didnt  come to not ty. So I  up to sville to see

    dorial and all and  did you bring me?

    And I said I didnt bring  I must of brung  on  t ty-five,  forty year old. Spoke good engliso  I didnt come up to be  insulted but I just ed o kno I done t I could for  I  t and  rared back and laug you in diapers yet? I s t son  of a bitc beto  to grease.

    ell. tty good. If I   guard  of said word one. And . .

    I seen t county prosecutor comin out of t a little to talk to  and opped and visited some. I didnt tell

    me tryin to  man and  could of put toget know.

    ask me not  ask me hin.

    t dont ask a lot of questions. One is too dumb to and t need to. Ill leave it to you to guess andin time in told  me t  of laorney for a ed.   to spend t of o on a daily basis just as a matter of course. I told  a laime told me  t in laeac to  rig just  follo so sure about t.  about t and  ty muco agree  la follo and  save you.  it dont chink. Finally I asked him if he knew who  Mammon was. And he said: Mammon?

    Yes. Mammon.

    You mean like in God and Mammon?

    Yessir.

    ell,  say as I do. I knos in t the devil?

    I dont knoo look it up. I got a feelin I ougo know w is.

    be getting ready to take up the  spare bedroom.

    ell, I said, t o familiarize myself  s.

    ion. ery man  you t trooper and burned  do you kno him?

    I dont kno.

    Yeah.

    ty muc.

    Is ty much or is he one?

    No,  t. But he is.

    you  o  him.

    I said t  about it since and I to ion is t ain tain  t you  you may very  be  equal to and I t t its real and  not just in your  all t sure  is you have said.

    Loretta did say one to t t it  my fault and I  said it  t too. I told  if you got a bad enougay out of it. And t.

    t  to tarted to go back to t topped and  about  and  to tackroom and got  out into tled at call door do th his ears scissoring.

    ting talked to t. Feels good to be out, dont it. You knos all rig  you  it. ell find em.

    Forty minutes later opped and sat tc ridge to tting o of t, tain of it folloill air. ts my  yonder, old t always was.

    toget to arners ell and dismounted and sat under ttonanks. Late in t be  seein them much longer.

    Se in the year, she said.

    You e it.

    Leavin here?

    Leavin here.

    Im all right.

    Because of me t it?

    S a certain age I dont guess thing as  good change.

    I guess rouble then.

    ell be all rigo like havin you home for dinner.

    I like bein ime.

    I remember old ter or for  I  didnt say not lunch.

    Bell smiled. Ill bet she wishes he could come home now.

    Ill bet soo. Ill bet I do, for t matter.

    I s ougo of said t.

    You didnt say nothin wrong.

    Youd say t anyways.

    ts my job.

    Bell smiled. You  tell me if I he wrong?

    Nope.

    if I ed you to?

    tough.

    ctle brindled desert doves come stooping in under t. Is  t true? he said.

    Pretty muc altogether.

    Is t a good idea?

    ell, sever it  youd get it figured out h no help from me.

    And if it  disagreed about I reckon Id get over it.

    not.

    S  it up, ss nice just to be here.

    Yes mam. It is indeed.