In t up ics, ted.

    Sidds to a poor Brareet. e only once a day, and never someted for fifteen days. ed for ty-eigurned to icy cempt, rading, princes ing, mourners rying to s determining t suitable day for seeding, lovers loving, mot  all lied, it all stank, it all stank of lies, it all pretended to be meaningful and joyful and beautiful, and it all  concealed putrefaction. tasted bitter. Life orture.

    A goal stood before Siddo become empty, empty of t, empty of y of joy and sorroo  to be a self any more, to find tranquility ied o be open to miracles in unselfiss, t , timate part of me o a of my being, .

    Silently, Siddo burning rays of tly above, glo, and stood til  any pain nor t any more. Silently, ood ter  stood til  feel til t, until t. Silently, ering ayed motionless, until no blood floil notung any more, until nothing burned any more.

    Sidd uprigo breato get along o stop breato calm t of , leaned to reduce ts of , until t none.

    Instructed by t if tised self-denial, practised meditation, according to a neo  and mountains,  bloated, stank, decayed, urned into a skeleton, turned to dust, urned, tered as dust, asted toxication of ted in ne like a er in ternity  suffering began.  of o tone, er, and aime to find urned round in t t, overcame t, felt ne.

    Sidd arily suffering and overcoming pain, , tiredness.  tation, to be void of all conceptions. to go, a times   to times, stayed in notayed in tone, turn able, inescapable , in t the cycle which had been forced upon him.

    By ook ts. to one anot to beg for food for teachers.

    quot;; Sidd;;

    Govinda ans;e inue learning. Youll be a great Samana, Sidden t;

    Quot;I cant  feel t it is not like t Ive learned, being among to tavern of t part of a to;

    Quot;Siddting me on. ation, ivity against c;

    And Siddly, as if alking to ; is meditation?  is leaving ones body?  is fasting?  is  is fleeing from t is a s escape of t is a s numbing of t tlessness of life. t numbing is  finds in ted coconut-milk. t feel  feel t numbing of t Siddaying in t is, o;

    Quot;You say so, o you kno Sidd and a Samana is no drunkard. Its true t a drinker numbs s true t s, but urn from to be unc become ,-- risen several steps.quot;

    And Sidd;I do not kno t I, Sidd numbing of tations and t I am just as far removed from ion, as a c;

    And once again, anotime,  togeto beg for some food in teaco speak and said: quot; no pat  closer to enlig? Mig closer to salvation? Or do ;

    Quot;e , Siddill muco learn. e are not going around in circles, ;

    Sidd; Samana, our venerable teac;

    Quot;Our oldest one mig sixty years of age.quot;

    And Sidd;y years and  reacurn seventy and eig as old and , and ate. But  reac and . O of all t t a single one, not a single one, s, to deceive ot t important t find.quot;

    quot;If you only,quot; spoke Govinda, quot; speak sucerrible  among so many learned men, among so many Braere and venerable Samanas, among so many wrying, so many ;

    But Siddained just as muc, a sligly mocking voice: quot;Soon, Govinda, your friend , o rong as ever. I aled for knoer year. Per  as  and just as profitable, if I  took me a long time and am not finis, o to be learned! t o as `learning. t one knoman, ture. And so Im starting to believe t to kno, t;

    At topped on t;If you, Sidd botalk! truly, you ir up fear in my . And just consider: ity of prayer, y of te,  , o  is  is precious, ;

    And Govinda mumbled a verse to himself, a verse from an Upanishad:

    , loses ation of Atman, unexpressable by words is .

    But Sidd.  about to  to their end.

    Yes, , standing t  o be  remains?  can stand test? And he shook his head.

    At one time, er being retold many times: A man ama by name, ted one, ted to eac possession,   a ic, but udents.

    ts fragrants rose up, o and in t, tama, talk, ion.

    It  in a country and neo ed ilence, and as sucalk about it, many , but many  on to seek t like t fragrant mytama, t enlig, urned into ted of o t ama igation.

    t. t of magic flos. After all, to bear--and beo spring forto call out, comforting, mild, full of noble promises. Every a longing, felt oranger he Sakyamuni.

    t, and also Sidd. talked about it, because t one of t like t to be an ascetic before and , but urned back to luxury and worldly pleasures, and ama.

    quot;O; Govinda spoke one day to ;today, I ed me into eac ac to myself: If only I oo, if only oo, Siddo see teaced man! Speak, friend,   to go too and listen to teac;

    Quot;Alay o live to be sixty and seventy years of age and to keep on practising ts and exercises, le of . So no to take a neeac;

    Quot;Youre mocking me. Mock me if you like, Sidd  also developed a desire, an eagerness, to eac at one time said to me, you  ;

    At toucouc;ell, Govinda, youve spoken ly. If you only remembered t I rustful and tired against teac my fait to us by teac lets do it, my dear, I am o listen to teac I believe t asted t fruit of teac;

    Quot;Your  tell me, amas teac fruit to us?quot;

    Quot;Let us eat t and  for t, o t, ama, consisted in ter to give us, o us a s.quot;

    On t one of t ed to leave  one esy and modesty becoming to a younger one and a student. But ted to leave alked loudly and used crude swearwords.

    Govinda artled and became embarrassed. But Sidd o Govindas ear and  to s Ive learned somet;

    Positioning  of trated soul, ured te, took aly, e, ionless,  poo Sidd Sidds brougrol, o carry out, ures of blessing, spoke stammeringly a godly urned t on tations.

    On t;O is  is very o cast a spell on an old Samana. truly, if you ayed to er.quot;

    quot;I do not seek to er,quot; said Sidd;Let old Samanas be content s!quot;