And because of ed to talk about personal t here.
Martin s drink up and go, and ood up. But Captain Coffee , s tter noo e conversation, and ood completely, and side until e, for reasons I cant go into. And didnt matter, ill outside unless anyone else came. And ts arbucks for our coffee meetings. It rate on tside c stealing s, or biscotties as places like Starbucks being unpersonal and all t, but s ?
Id be lost, if JJ and people like t got to kno t o go into small places omers, small booksaurants and cafes. Im in tore and Borders and Starbucks and Pizza Express, .
t a lot in America, read books and talk about tin reckoned it Id never , so it cant be t fas it in Dazed and Confused. t of it o talk about Somet of t get into ro arbucks usually ended up. And o read books by people heir heads.
Martin said
about staying alive, not about topping yourself. But it turned out ters ook tion, and for ted on using funds from our media appearances to buy ourselves the books.
Any turned out not to be tion at all. Fucking ry and read tuff by people ed a lig I read enougo knoence to see t. I sort of identify , because I suffer from t sometimes, but ake o go public . I mean, it of souvenir be people like us could learn from ies and t, but it it, because in t a book publis so mucition. So you could marco a publis tand you. try pilates or salsa dancing instead.
JJ it , so I like it. because your daddy reads books? Is t read books, bad luck, and I told because you didnt go to sc , arent t alloo say anyt books because t like t muc o o our reading group I , and upid as to expect anyt going to , Ill say so. And , Yea youre gonna say t, arent you, because youre so fucking contrary, sorry Maureen. And I said, Yea, because youre suc, and to be talking about in th, Primo Levi, hemingway.
So I said, ell of doing t? s fun about t? And s not Pop Idol, man. You dont vote for t one. t t, and alk about to go by, I dont accept t. In fact I no te. And JJ got really t, and tness tin stepped in and to do any more books for a ead. Maureen Cobain, can you believe it?
I do t, but I do. Its just t my from everyone elses. Before I to get angry and maybe a bit violent, toug. Any nig about JJ, and hem.
And its true , not really, alto pretend t he does.
Jen they scared me.
they scare me even more now.
did to ening only to to no one else - not er, no one? I got out of bed and into exactly as it . (People are al in films, and you t, like you dont a guest bedroom, or some all your crap. But you try going in t ory, Catco Kill a Mockingbird, tc, because t ed us to read), Crime and Punis, , Good Places to Go to Disappear… t a joke, t last one.
I dont to be a big reader, because s me, but Im sure I er at it if s put me off by disappearing. It t time Id been in be t, I kne t me, and is kno one of t o understand. I dont mean t Ill find some sentence s ion mark by texas. I just mean t if I read everyt took tention in t fe some picture of even knoo find out, you, considering as hing.
But I dont. I cant. I cant because Im too lazy, too stupid, and I cant even make t because sometops me. t sit t me, day after day, and one day I kno them.
So, no, Im not a big reader.
JJ Our cultural program books out of t s read stuff alk about, if you knoed to talk about a big fan of Literature. of books in prison, but mostly biograp adversities, like Nelson Mandela and t of Martin S t t reasons. And, believe me, you dont to kno of books. Youd find it offensive.
S about me, t be? Ive spent my entire life read - my folks, my sister, most of tion - and it makes you really defensive, after a t I mind being called a fag bla friends bla to me, being a fag is about edly, but its so much?
Sure, I could be pretty anti-social able in a American Pastoral isnt.
Eddie . It elling I . And like a marriage, toget got; but no I t it, toget. e kne going to make it, as a band and maybe even as friends, and so made Eddie panic more, because I t idea t reading o of new career. Yeas w happens in life.
be a cool guy. ising agency. e spent all talking about tuff icing all t, and it broke bots.
And all t is a long-ass Jess.
Id left one band full of aggressive illiterates, and I sure as going to join anoting, sleeping - t just makes you unhappier.
And for some reason, I t music o be easier, . I only invested in books, but I got my I couldnt go t s like go, and poured to a little tiny bottle and corked it up. And s to play and sing, akes t, and you can smell it. Youre pinned into your seat, as if its a its not - its still, and quiet, and you dont to breaten it aening to Maureens, because play our o Starbucks, and at Maureens youve got tty breatra freaky instrument. So I ting to chese peoples lives for ever.
At t song, Jess started putting and making faces.
But or something.
t to be an insult: I t poets ures you migestine.
I dont mind it, said Martin. I , if he was playing in a wine bar.
I would, said Jess.
I o punc simultaneously, but rejected t it oo quickly, and t be enoug to keep on pummeling ter t a time. Its music rage, iny part of you kno ts these people dead.
And to Five Leaves Left weird.
got ears? Maureen said suddenly. Cant you iful me.
part, like a little kid, nah-nah, nah-nah-nah.
Dont pretend to be more foolishan you are, Jess, said Maureen.
Because youre foolis is. Seamed. Soo. Just listen to , and stop blathering.
And Jess could see t s it, and s up, and ened to t of t Maureen closely you could see ening a little.
een seventy-four. y-six.
ty-six. S for a moment, tful, and I ive sra years. You people to respond, but sometimes t, you know?
People dont to , do they? she said.
No one said anyt sure w.
t to kno. t to kno Im feeling om Jones makes you feel. Or t Australian girl play are sad dont fit in.
ed never alk like t even kno to stop her.
Its funny, because people ts Matty t stops me fitting in. But Mattys not so bad. … Its tty makes me feel t stops me fitting in. You get t of everyto guess all time it puts people off. Im tired of it.
And so suddenly Maureen , and because s too, and I ed to say t to her. You need a holiday.
I said it because I ed to be sympatic, but tony, and I realized t noony he money.
about t? ? I said. Lets all take Maureen on in burst out laughing.
Yea, said Jess. are eers for like an old folks old, I said. y-one, she said.
OK, not an old folks home. A boring folks home.
And fascinating person on t? Martin said.
I dont look like t, for a start. Any you unnoticed, amid all ter and tarted to cry.
Im sorry, Maureen, said Martin. I being ungallant. I just couldnt imagine tting around a swimming pool on our sun loungers.
No, no, said Maureen. I took no offense. Not mucs to go on s fine. I just got a bit ed it. Its been a long… Nobodys… I … It nice of s all.
Oin quietly. No t ty ood. Martin meant by Oext, if I can explain an obscenity y, is t kind of asso say to Maureen, you kno t counts. s enough for you.
And like five days later o tenerife.
It mine. I didnt feel t I to decide, not really, even ter of to me. I ed t place, to JJ, Cosmic tony, so I didnt t e on it. I t I did is, I abstained.
It as if t, t.
te t, ter to go noines Day. For a moment t il Martin pointed out t to cover Mattys time in tre as well.
Lets go Maureen, t, for a moment, until it turned out she was joking.
I cant remember t time I because I because I people to feel sorry for me; its just t it range feeling. it even alloo t t it o anything.
It up to t point, o eac ory, considering . Youd tory of four people ed to her.
But it been up until t at all, not me and Martin sitting on Jesss o be kind, ratil t ory of four people eacher.
them swore, anyway.
I tle sobbing noises t embarrassed everyone, myself included.
F— s only a s just beac.
I ed to tell Jess t I even seen an Englisty left sco take to Brig say anyt kno of many t I could feel t of t one, so I kept it to myself. You kno t going ell people t fact about your life, just because to feel sorry for you. I suppose its ell t ends up making terrible.
I to describe every moment of t seemed so exciting, but t ake, too. If youre like everybody else t an airport looks like, sounds and smells like, and if I tell you about it, t anot I seen ten years. Id got a one-year passport from t office, and even t caused too mucement, because I sa a big traveler. One of t invite me to ty I didnt go to; one day, I t, Ill tell o take my first trip abroad. Id really o kno, though.
You probably kno you sit in a ro me sit in t, because tin sat in t next to fees. After a little ting next to ts ting and carrying on. Anot terrible noise imes t knoomacurned to er, and Martin o alk to me.
And you probably also kno , you cant t til teful to God for providing t o understand tter, and so you end up in a terrible muddle and needing to talk to a priest. I decided I sit in t on t kno people .
Not ty felt t strange.
But I also enjoyed tness of it, so it probably at all like missing a leg, because I dont suppose people ness of it very muco say t it Matty, but its muco move around it? So maybe it ruto say t being on t Matty a t, and it in t aken off. I missed o die, and I said goodbye to hen.
e didnt fall out on t nigel s and bat been expecting. And poured into torrent of er t dam, and it nearly knocked me over. My knees buckled for a moment, and I o lean against too, but it fierce and strong, like t; it just sat quiet and blue, and made tiny little murmuring noises.
Some people can see t to, I t, but to stop t because it ed to t. It ime to be feeling grateful, not to be coveting my neighbours wife, or his sea views.
e ate in a seafront restaurant not far from tel. I e squid and lobster, and Jess tell you en out in a restaurant, or to do t.
I didnt even try to tell t for myself, and kne to carry. Anyime t it all, apart from took it for granted.
I o say t care sounds: it meal Ive ever evening Ive ever so terrible, to be so positive about something?